Toity Doily

I drink enough fluids in the morning to "re-hydrate" to keep me "going" until at least noon, if you get my drift. Well, I have always had an overactive bladder, but I'd venture to say that mornings are most significant.

If there is a used calorie count available for everything one must go through to position oneself, I should be losing weight, but evidently, it isn't working. Regardless, I'm off the path....sorry.

Yesterday, I went shopping in Centerra at the JoAnn's Super fabric store. I think I was in there a total of 2 hours and made 3 trips to the Women's room. One my first trip in there, I started writing this blog, because, I ran into one of "my challenges" and thought it was worth talking to the girls about.

Go in the room, lock the door, take a paper seat cover out of the container, and place it on the seat. It really didn't take but a few seconds to start drifting into the bowl. I hadn't even had the chance to start unfastening my waistband on my pants . Now, I have just entered the store after just arriving and I haven't "gone" since leaving home. You know that feeling when you really hope you don't sneeze or cough. YES! Well, there I was.... a sinking doily falling into the bowl. So, fine...grab another one and told it to behave...and fortunately, it listened. Since this blog has nothing to do about discussing my bladder, I'll try to not go there again unless totally necessary.

I thought about past experiences that I've had along this line and I think it's worth sharing. When DIA first opened it's doors, it was my first exposure to auto flushing. Wow...those are really neat! So, I go in, close the door, take out the doily, place it on the seat, turn around and start unfastening and flush! GONE! Turn around, put another one on, turn back around, FLUSH! GONE!..... unfasten my pants, drop clothing to knees, take a doily out, put it on the seat and spin around at top speed, aiming my behind for the seat, hoping I don't miss it, and get it parked prior to flushing. Well, you know, those things are activated by motion.....ta da....a free spray while you are sitting doing your thing.....

A few weeks later, I was taking Kara to the airport for a departure and we were in the women's room. I told her about my experience and she came up with the best answer....are you ready for this? Drop "trou", take doily out of container, stick it on your hiney and sit down. Now how clever is that?

I have a friend that I met through our motor home club in Arizona. She is a total kick. Give her two margarita's and watch out. We used to go on an annual trip into Mexico with our club and the first night's ritual is to walk to the nearby restaurant with patio bar and sip on some margarita's. I hardly knew Dorothy at this point, but I knew right away, when she returned from the women's room wearing a....you got it....doily....for a hat, that she and I would become good friends. She got clever with her form of creativity and also made a bouquet of flowers once with several of them... I think they are still kinda escorting Dorothy to restrooms so she doesn't take all the doilys.